Friday, August 21, 2009

Moving On

When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.” - Alexander Graham Bell

A family member of mine had a best friend who died of polio. It was her best friend, and she was truly a wonderful person. But, the tragedy was that the parents of this girl could never get past the passing of their only daughter. Whenever I would meet them... and this was 20 years after her death... the conversation would inevitably steer towards talking about her. Even as a kid, I could tell this was unhealthy.

As I get older, I know more, feel more, understand more. And with age comes an ever increasing ability to plumb the depths of the meaning of life. You also know that you can't let yourself get stuck in the past, or you'll die there, too. A self-inflicted mental kill.

I have had some great dogs, been around some great dogs. Some died. Some were dogs I knew and belonged to others, but now are not a part of my life any more. And I miss them all. But, I also know that when one dog leaves your life, it opens the door for a new dog. It's that way with people in your life, too. Mourning the loss or death of another person, a great love, a significant relationship, or pet is a necessary, yet tragic, part of life. I have some terrible regrets, things I wished had gone differently in my life and in the lives of others, and I have felt unbelievable pain at times when going through these times. Yet, there is also the new day approaching. And a choice to see the glass as half full or half empty. And having the will to survive and love again.

Life is that way. Nothing is static. At some point, you have to accept and go through the grieving, then put away the past, pick yourself up, and move on to a new future. Try looking up the phrase, "Remember Lot's wife." Sometimes what is behind can destroy you if you look back and long for it. But, you never really forget the past, if it was meaningful, you just try to remember the good, and try to learn life's lessons, too. If you lost a pet, get a new one. The new one won't replace the old dog, but it will fill the hole and you'll find new joys. The same thing will be true with all of these types of life changes that are thrust upon us... you'll get another chance in life.

I know it is painful to lose something or someone valuable in your life. I've been there. I understand.

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